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Bedtime Scripts by Age
Word-for-word lines for the hardest 30 minutes of the day · Part of the free Parent Decoder Toolkit · Print me
Ages 6-9 · sleep needed: 9-12 hours per night (AASM consensus for ages 6-12)
"Bath, book, bed — same as always. If we're done by 8:00 you earn Sleep Mode Activated. You choose the book."
- Same bedtime every night including weekends (within 30-60 minutes).
- A 3-step wind-down routine (bath, book, bed) that takes 30 minutes and never includes screens.
- Devices charge in a parent's room overnight.
Ages 10-13 · sleep needed: 9-12 hours (ages 10-12) to 8-10 hours (age 13) per night (AASM consensus)
"Phone curfew is 8:30. Handing it over calmly is +80 every single night. That's the easiest Aura in the house."
- A consistent phone curfew 60 minutes before lights-out (e.g., 8:30 phone, 9:30 sleep).
- Weekend bedtime no more than 1 hour later than weekdays to protect the rhythm.
- Alarms come from a real alarm clock so the phone has no reason to be in the room.
Ages 14-17 · sleep needed: 8-10 hours per night (AASM consensus for ages 13-18)
"I'm not setting your bedtime. I'm setting the phone's bedtime: 10:30 in the kitchen. Calm handoff is +80, no questions asked."
- Phone charges outside the bedroom by an agreed time (e.g., 10:30) even if bedtime is later.
- Aim for 8-10 hours; weekend wake time within 2 hours of weekday wake time.
- Caffeine after 3pm is a sleep decision, so it's discussed like one.
Devices out of the bedroom is the one non-negotiable at every age (bedtime device use roughly doubles the odds of poor sleep — Carter et al., 2016).